Friday, August 22, 2008

Wives

If you get a bad wife, your life is miserable & it gets worse every single day.(so I'm told) because I would have no idea what it was like since my wife is perfect in every possible way.(vbs)
The one thing about wives is that we will never understand them so quit trying & if you think you know your wife, you need counseling because you are delusional.
If I was going to give one golden nugget of information about wives it would be to leave them alone until they want you around, otherwise you will irritate them, put yourself in a position of defending yourself or you will become completely insane because you won't have a clue what to do when they make no sense at all. There is logic & there is emotion but woman don't have much use for logic because their emotions control every decision. Women work off of emotion & it drives guys nuts. We can't comprehend making decisions off of emotions or changing your opinion hourly because of emotions. Women come across vulnerable & soft when we meet them but as soon as we are in the web, nobody is more opinionated or stubborn than a woman. The soft & vulnerable side is out the window forever & the woman we wanted to protect from the mean & harsh world, has us looking for a place to hide or an exorcism because we are afraid to death of this woman & now know what she is capable of.
I guess the moral of the story, is that woman come across weak & sensitive when we meet them so they can get a man but once they have us, we become their slaves for life. You might think this is a trap & maybe it is & with so many guys going through this, you would think we would never get married but what is the motivation for us to keep going through this?
I think it's because we come across strong & invincible to impress people & feel manly but really we are insecure & intimidated by most things in life & if it wasn't for women we would still be eating raw meat in the cave & beating each other up for fun.
Yes, we need women & they need us but if you are going to have a wife, find one like mine. She is my best friend, we have been through hell together & worked through it, she is a hiking maniac & those that have hiked with her know it, which I like. We have many of the same interests & after all these years, she is more sexy & beautiful than the day we met.
Good luck on the search but be careful----it is a trap----but you just might like being caught.

4 comments:

carly said...

hey! when are you coming out here! we might go camping on the 5th but I want to make sure that's not when you guys are going to be visiting! So let us know!

carly said...

ps, i really enjoy reading your blog on my lunch break at work! it's so entertaining and is a lot more interesting then consuming my lunch break with celebrities lives!

When Two Became One said...

Oh my goodness dad you just made my day so much better. I was laughing with Joseph forever. I think he found this one the funniest. I have to say that you sure know how to word things just right :-) I love you tons!! and can't wait to see you soon.

Elise Maygren said...

That was great!!! Although, now that you have reveled our secrets what are all the single women going to do? :) I love you, Dad! Elise