Loving Remembrance

I at times, think way to much about things but there are moments when those thoughts move me to find a greater cause or to help another or to remember an inspiring moment in my life.
This would be one of those moments & I will share it with you.
There is nothing, I love more than my children & every memory or moment with them has defined me as a human & next to my wife, my children are the best part of my life & what I love most about my existence on earth.
Watching a young baby begin to make decisions, talk & walk are rewarding but as I look back, they are the moments when the child begins the process of pulling away from me & becoming independent. It is bittersweet to see a child grow into a teenager & see the transformation from an innocent little trusting & loving child to becoming a "monster". Thank goodness, this only lasts for a short time because it hurts more than any other pain. You can't make every decision for a baby, watch them grow, make their life as successful & enjoyable as possible without having a deep rooted love for that child but when they discard you like an old newspaper to be with friends, it is hard to handle.
I understand that it is a process & that we want independent, self sufficient children to become educated, intelligent & good hearted adults but for me, I will always see my grown kids as the little child curled up in my lap, asking me to read to them or wanting to play a game.
I know it is selfish to want the same relationship with my children now that I once had when they were little but when my thoughts flee from today & escape into years gone by, my heart becomes full because of the intense love I have for my children. Every chance phone call or visit with my children floods my heart & mind with such an unexplainable joy that I can't find words to express them.
I don't think my children know how much I enjoy seeing them or visiting with them or when they remember my birthday or send a unexpected e-mail or card but these encounters & experiences are what I find myself looking forward to more than any present or vacation.
I may have provided my children with a safe home to live, with the support they needed & the things they needed to grow up in a normal environment but the reward of having them go off on their own & then come home, full of love & support for me, is the best part of my life & what truly makes me happy. I love you with all my heart & not a single day goes by that you aren't in my heart & prayers. regardless of what the future holds for us, you have made my life rewarding, happy & complete, You truly are the best part of my life, along with your mom of course. I love you. Dad