Overcoming Fear

What is fear? If you are afraid of something, does that mean you are afraid of everything? I can't speak for everyone but as far as fear has entered my life on occasion it is specific to a certain situation or thought & doesn't affect other facets of my life.
I was afraid of the dark when I was younger & had a traumatic event to magnify that fear which became an insecurity that lingered throughout many parts of my life, causing me to be afraid of other things. I was afraid to speak or be the center of attention in public, I was afraid to be around adults or to have to speak to them, I was afraid of my Dad, I was afraid to sleep because my demons became vivid reality as I had nightmares all night long. I was so afraid of the dark & my nightmares that I would rather wet the bed than to get up in the dark. This became an added burden because my Dad was not very patient with me regardless of my Mom being very patient. I was yelled at, spanked, humiliated & spent many days & nights feeling alone & worthless because of my insecurities.
I was 12 when I decided that I had enough & had to take control of my life & quit living a double life. I say double life because I was popular, good in sports & polite to others but on the inside I was falling apart while thinking I was the only person in the world that had these fears & was to afraid to talk about them.
I decided to conquer my fears, one at a time & felt that if I ever had a chance to be strong mentally that I would have to take this on myself, of which I did.
I didn't mind hiking, fishing or being in the woods alone during the day but once it got dark, I was in the light & at my home, which is why my fear of the dark challenge became so remarkable. I took my small dog, some camping gear & food & walked about a mile through the forest to a favorite fishing hole of mine. I built a campfire pit & rounded up enough wood to last me all night. You have to remember that I was 12 or 13 & the mere thought of being alone in the woods after dark was the very nightmare I had run from hundreds of times in my nights when I slept. It started off ok because I was fishing & playing with the dog but when it started to get dark, I kept thinking, I can still make it out of here before black covered the forest but then it happened, It was to dark to leave & I knew that I was facing the biggest demon of my life. Fear overcame me & I was at the state of panic while trying to keep the fire as big as possible. I tried to take my mind off the fear by playing with the dog & eating but I wasn't hungry & every time I played with the dog, I lost focus of the forest noises of which I was paranoid about.
As night settled in & the darkness engulfed me I laid perfectly quiet in my sleeping bag within reach of an enormous wood pile that I could keep the fire going with. I heard the forest noises & tried to imagine what each sound was so I could justify that it wasn't a bear or mountain lion that was looking for a 12 year old meal.
I struggled to stay awake & thinking back, I don't know why because I certainly couldn't have fought off a bear or mountain lion as a helpless kid but at the time, I suppose that I believed I could. Next thing I realized was that it was getting light out & my fears began to subside as the sun made its way over the mountain ridge between myself & civilization. Not only did I make it through the night, I realized that fear was a state of mind & that if I could convince my mind that the dark was nothing to fear, then I could conquer all my fears.
I began an annual quest to identify fears & conquer them. My birthday became the point of realization & myself along with trusted friends began finding things that scared me, with the hope that I could overcome those fears. My journey took me from sky diving, bungee jumping & survival camping in many different weather conditions to fire walking which has it's own type of fear attached. I heard about a fire walk over hot coals & had to see what this was about & after a couple hour training on mind control & self worth, I followed some of the participants across 20ft of red hot coals. I have since done this three other times over 20 years & each time , although the fear is gone, I learn something new about myself & the quest I have to overcome fear.
I have done many things over the years to overcome fear & although my quest may not be yours, I would recommend that you at least find out who you are & what you are capable of because if you don't push yourself, you really won't know what you are afraid of until that defining moment arrives.
Fear for some is a measure of comfort & tells us when to stop while others, whether right or wrong are motivated by fear. I have to say that the latter is more in line with me but I also will back off in sight of fear if the outcome is not worth the sacrifice or pain.
I suppose the moral of the story is that if you are comfortable with yourself in any given situation, you can decide whether fear stops you or motivates you because it really doesn't matter what anyone else does, you need to know your limitations but don't let limitations stop you from being & doing whatever you want to do.